You absolutely may not run into the street without looking both ways. And you may not cross the street without holding a grown-up’s hand. And you absolutely must not panic and break all those rules when you see a spider the size of your FACE.
When I saw that thing, even I jumped a bit.
It would’ve included a completely undignified SQUEAK, too, except I was holding you and Putting On A Brave Face and you were trembling, whimpering in my arms and I was Making Assurances and then killing the fucking thing with my boot.
Even though, yes, spiders are not meant to be scary and it’s totally okay when they’re in our house cause, yes, they eat bugs.
When they scare your girl twin so bad that she runs into the street, fleeing to the safe space of Mama’s Left Leg, they DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE.
But if we’re going to talk about your birth, I need to touch on the pregnancy – cause THAT was also HARD.
That’s the night before – I’m so ready to MEET YOU because the pregnancy was SO HARD. And we’ve DONE IT! Thirty FOUR weeks, babies! Single babies aim for thirty six, but twins get thirty-four as the goal.
Let’s talk about THAT rollercoaster ride, shall we?
I finished it weeks ago, actually, but had a BUNCH of things to distract me like hormones and civil suits and, well, all kinds of adventures, but decided to put my foot down and focus this week with my kickass life coach, Rachael.