Who Down With OCP?!?

YEAH YOU KNOW ME!

I went to six conferences in forty eight days and that’s just a bit overwhelming.

I had this abstract idea that it was over the course of the around eight weeks or so but then I looked at the actual dates and pulled it up on a calendar calculator and now I want to vomit.

FORTY. EIGHT. DAYS.

This is in stark contrast to the rest of the year when i didn’t attend ANYTHING.

Wait, no, I did That One Thing – OpenStack Project Team Gathering where I did a ton of interviews and OMG I just realized I have to edit SO MANY VIDEOS.

Aw, crap.

Now, part of the not travelling AT ALL is because I was coming back from maternity leave and didn’t want to travel while the twins were so young and part of the travelling WAY TOO MUCH is because dayum if I didn’t just plan for that so poorly but also I really missed travel and speaking and doing All The Things.

Let’s make 2019 much more balanced and not have entire quarters of no travel NOR have entire quarters of all the travel, mkay?

Also, my partner will kill me, understandably, kthxbye. Cause three kids and one parent is ROUGH.

#OneYearOldTWINS
#FourYearOldBOY
#OneParent
#OW

But first, let’s look back at that travel insanity and Learn The Lessons.

As an aside, I started to write up ALL of the travel reports at once and got completely overwhelmed, so this is ONLY THE FIRST TWO.

Bite sized chunks are bite sized.

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Exploring All The Local Cafes of Haren

Okay, so this may seem like more of an advertisement piece, but it’s where I am and that’s more important than maintaining my I Have Totally Not Sold Out reputation.

But who are we kidding – I’d totally sell out, given the opportunity.

And so would you.

Ahem.

This post certainly got dark quickly, didn’t it. Let’s see if we can jump back into your sarcastically light hearted world again, shall we?

When we lived in Groningen proper, I used to get the boys out the door, then get ready for the day, then walk into the city to my absolutely favourite place in the world to code, Op z’n Kop.

If you are local, not allergic to cats, and love cake, then GET THEE TO OP Z’N KOP. They open officially at ten, have free wifi, power sockets, a public bathroom, tons of tea options and ALL THE CAKE.

And cats.

It’s a cat cafe.

Let’s give that the proper excitement that deserves.

IT’S A FREAKIN’ CAT CAFE!! ! IN THE MIDDLE OF GRONINGEN!! ! AND IT SERVES AMAZING CAKE, TOO!! !

I miss them. A ton. And their cats. And their cake.

I think part of why it took me so long to start exploring Haren when I moved down here is that I knew that none would be as solid as Op z’n Kop. And it’s true – none of them are cat cafes, but DAYUM, there’s some solid options for Incredible Places To Work In Haren.

That should be the title of this piece, eh?

I mean, for social media purposes and such.

Whatevs.

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Navigating the Rush Hour

Back in the States, ‘rush hour’ refers to one of my favourite Jackie Chan movies as well as the hell that is a morning and evening commute to and from work made only slightly less miserable by the sweet soothing sounds of NPR while here in the Netherlands, rush hour TRAFFIC is so lame that you’re never actually STOPPED on the highway AT ALL.

Even if there’s a giant flaming bus by the side of the road and all cars are diverted to side roads.

Strangely specific example is strangely specific.

And also?

Los Angeles California and Atlanta Georgia COMPETE for Worse Traffic In The States and not only did I used to live and WORK in Atlanta, but I once had to change a flat tire on a Dodge Dakota Club Cab on the bottom highway of Spaghetti Junction DURING RUSH HOUR.

But in the Netherlands?

Rush hour ALSO refers to the chaos of the morning and the evening that exists when One Has Children.

And YESSSSS it is Exactly That Bad.

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Tea, A Drink With Jam And Bread

YES, I KNOW IT’S TUESDAY AND I SAID I’D POST ON WEDNESDAY / FRIDAY.

DEAL.

Cause you should always start a post in all caps, eh? Or start in aggressive American all caps and then switch to stereotypical Canadian politeness, eh?

Ahem.

We talked about how to figure out your topic, but sometimes you want to speak off the cuff, very last minute, and you wonder how the hell I did that speech that one time when I stepped into a speech competition at the very last second and TOTALLY WON.

Yes, it really happened.

Also, I’m writing this in the local cafe and I’m going to need to talk about SOMETHING as an example, so I’m going to talk about this here PLACE.

That will totally make more sense as you read. I promise.

Or not.

Let’s see what happens.

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But, Wait, Is Extemporaneously Even A Word?

first of all, let me say, that i LOVE the word ‘extemporaneously’ and now i’m TOTALLY going to google it because it might not even be a real word and i’ve been using it literally for years cause that’s how i roll.

“Carried out or performed with little or no preparation; impromptu: an extemporaneous piano recital. 2. Prepared in advance but delivered without notes or text: an extemporaneous speech. 3. Skilled at or given to unrehearsed speech or performance: an accomplished extemporaneous speaker.”

ah, that’s a relief.

cause i have entirely mispronounced and / or misused actual words AS WELL AS used entirely MADE UP words in all kinds of conversations including right there ON STAGE.

cause that’s how i roll.

this is how i give talks very last minute or entirely impromptu (one might say EXTEMPORANEOUSLY) including how i narrow down a topic (if i can talk about anything), how to deliver a fully organized speech, and i’m gonna go ahead and give you the punchline right now – once you’ve got the knowledge, you need to practice, practice, practice.

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