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Adventures in Pregnancy: The Red Cabbages

Symptoms of the Week: Constipation (cause you should always mention the poop FIRST – sets the tone #amirite), nausea, dizziness, CRYING, constant exhaustion, tension, anger, STRETCH MARKS, painful hips, and a persistent feeling of HUGENESS.

Yuppers, totally still puking.

The awesomeness of this week is that I FEEL big now. For a few days now, it feels like I’m wearing a corset all the time. And I often realize that I’ve been sitting with my ENTIRE core engaged.

I breathe.

And relax.

It helps a bit.

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Adventures in Pregnancy: The Rutabagas

Symptoms are pretty much the same as last week except the hips have become slightly more manageable.

Also, yes, still puking.

It’s awesome.

For the first time in this pregnancy, I feel BIG. Sure, my rings are still loose enough and I don’t have a double chin (yet) or stretch marks (yet) but I have GIRTH.

And I’m okay with that.

I mean, as much as one can be okay with that.

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Adventures in Pregnancy: The Ears of Corn

Symptoms: Dizziness, low energy, whack focus, holy good god PAINFUL hips, underlying constant angry attitude and nausea.

Yuppers, totally still puking.

Makes you wanna run out and get pregnant now now NOW. #AMIRITE

We’re buying a house. (And selling a house, wanna move to Groningen?) And having twins and thus we’re getting officially official life insurance. Except in the Netherlands, they call a Spade a Spade and it’s actually called….

DEATH Insurance.

Doesn’t that put a seriousness on it?

Doesn’t it JUST.

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Adventures in Pregnancy: The Spaghetti Squashes

I know, I know, I’ve been gone forevers.

And a day.

I’d gotten into this self preservation habit of just taking care of myself which included not posting / hiding under a rock / sleeping a bit more than pregnancy requires bordering on depressiveness, but I kept posting these weekly pictures of the bump and hoped it would be enough.

Thankfully, many of you kept reaching under the rock and asking how I was doing.

Thank you.

So let’s get you caught up, shall we?

“No, there is too much. Let me sum up.”

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Adventures in Pregnancy : The Glass Apples

Today is a marvelous one because P and I have been married fifteen years. And the twins are fifteen weeks.

Is this serendipity?

What does serendipity mean?

Please hold.

*looks it up*

Eh. Close enough.

The traditional gift for fifteen years (holy shit, fifteen years!) is crystal. But we’re having twins, people; we need to start acting like it and STOP SPENDING MONEY.

That scolding was more for me than P.

Okay, entirely for me.

But the modern gift is glass. And since the twins are at fifteen weeks which is, apparently, apple sized, Glass Apples.

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Please Be Healthy Please Be Fine

I will update this post as more information arrives. Timestamps are military UTC+2.

0900 : Woke up. Set the ringer on the phone to loud. Puked in the shower. Ate a bagel and cream cheese. Helped PROS.alpha get to daycare. Read.

1045 : Went to POP Poli Clinic Psychiatrist appointment. Cried a bit. She told me I seem much stronger than two years ago when she saw me last.

1145 : Ate P’s lunch.

1245 : Still waiting for results from Tuesday.

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Adventures in Pregnancy : The Lemons

I’m still (THANKFULLY) riding the high that is completing a second advanced manual and earning the Toastmasters Advanced Communicator Bronze award last night.

To be clear, I was crap.

Pale. Stiff. Sweating. Lots of uhms and ahs and unconscious pacing.

In true tech fashion, I was slapping the slides together seconds before the meeting started.

But.

It’s done! And filed! And hopefully the point will be awarded to our club in time to earn the Presidential’s Distinguished Club award.

I know. I know. You want to hear about the pregnancy.

FINE.

Let’s talk about pregnancy and vomit and blood and piss. YOU’VE BEEN WARNED.

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Adventures in Pregnancy : Tests on the Pea Pods

We’re doing the big tests now. The ones that involve multiple needles, no moving, meditative breathing, and going to your happy place.

There are also massive words like amniocentesis and comparative genomic hybridization (CGH) which is overwhelming, yes, but also calming because knowledge is power.

And the unknown is terrifying.

At the appointment this morning, the doctor (and two students) used sonogram to analyze the hell out of fetus one (the one with the thicker nuchal fold that MAY indicate any number of chromosomal abnormalities.

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